Missouri Classical Music News

C, E-flat and G go into a bar.

The bartender says, "Sorry, but we don't serve minors." So E-flat leaves,
and C and G have an open fifth between them.

After a few drinks, the fifth is diminished and G is out flat. F comes in
and tries to augment the situation, but is not sharp enough.

D comes in and heads for the bathroom, saying, "Excuse me. I'll just be a
second."

Then A comes in, but the bartender is not convinced that this relative of
C is not a minor.

Then the bartender notices B-flat hiding at the end of the bar and says,
"Get out! You're a minor and the seventh minor I've found in this bar
tonight."

E-flat comes back the next night in a three-piece suite with nicely
shined shoes. The bartender says, "You're looking sharp tonight. Come on
in, this could be a major development."

Sure enough, E-flat soon takes off his suit and everything else, and is
au natural.

Eventually C sobers up and realizes in horror that he's under a rest.
C is brought to trial, found guilty of contributing to the diminution of
a minor, and is sentenced to 10 years of DS without Coda at an upscale
correctional facility.

On appeal, however, C is found innocent of any wrongdoing, even accidental.
The judge rules that all contrary motions are bassless.